learashi: (Sakumoto hands)
[personal profile] learashi
Pairing: Sakumoto

Rating: This chapter R

Genre: m-preg, romance, au

Disclaimer: This is entirely fiction, and couldn’t exist anywhere else but in my head.

Summary: Sakurai Sho has always achieved everything he's ever wanted in his successful business life. Why is it so different in his personal life? Sho has no idea that anything is even wrong with his marriage until he comes home one night and finds his young husband gone. Will he be able to find Jun and make things right between them again?


Previously: CH 1, CH 2, CH 3, CH 4, CH 5, CH 6, CH 7, CH 8



"Good morning Jun, I didn't know that you were scheduled to work so early today," Ohno said. It was only five thirty in the morning and he was still baking the last of the bread.

Jun's eyes were-red rimmed dark holes in a face that was as pale as the dough that Ohno was shaping into rolls.

"I couldn't sleep so I thought that I might as well make myself useful. It isn't a problem for you, I hope. But I can always go away again..." Jun mumbled in a dull voice.

"No, please stay." There was no way that Ohno was going to allow Jun to leave looking the way that he did. He didn't want to be responsible for him collapsing in the street somewhere. "I need someone to slice the fruit to decorate the custard tarts."

This way Jun could sit on a stool at the bench to work and Ohno could keep an eye on him at the same time.

Chinen bustled about restocking the display cases and serving coffee to some early birds eager to get their first fix of the day. He chattered as he worked, mostly receiving grunts in response from Ohno and no response at all from Jun who didn't even look up from his work.

After a half an hour Ohno fetched a glass of milk and a warm roll and pointedly left them beside Jun. He was convinced that the younger man hadn't eaten anything all morning.

When he looked back in on Jun fifteen minutes later and saw that the food was still untouched Ohno knew that he needed help. As he walked through to his office he pulled out his mobile and after making sure that he couldn't be heard he dialled his go-to person and asked him to come around as soon as possible. It was stupidly early in the morning to disturb him but this was obviously an emergency.

++++

Jun was slicing the skin off a wedge of pineapple when he saw Nino heading towards Ohno's office. Nino was on the phone with Sho who was obviously still angry after their massive argument the night before. Sho had eventually slept alone in the spare room, leaving the master bedroom to Jun.

After lying awake for the entire night Jun had eventually given up and decided to go to the bakery. He knew it was cowardly, but he was far too tired and stressed to be able to handle another confrontation with Sho.

The sight of Nino and the frown on his face momentarily distracted Jun as he tried to cut through the tough skin. The knife blade slipped and sliced deeply through his left hand and wrist, blood immediately dripping over the cutting board.

Not wanting to go to Ohno and therefore anywhere near Nino and potentially have to speak to Sho on the phone, Jun decided that rather than seek help he would to go to the bathroom and fix the cut himself. He wrapped a dishcloth haphazardly around the wound and walked unsteadily across to the employee amenities, not even noticing that he was leaving a trail of red drops on the floor behind him.

When Jun removed the cloth from his hand more blood than he expected flowed down his fingers and dripped into the sink. He had never previously had any problems with the sight of blood, but obviously his pregnancy combined with his lack of breakfast was making him feel weak and dizzy. He tried to fasten the cloth more tightly around the cut but his other hand was shaking too badly.

Realizing that he was out of his depth Jun turned to call for help which made the room spin sickeningly around him. Things went blurry as he felt his legs give way underneath him and then black when he struck his head on the edge of the sink as he fell.

++++

"I thought you said that Jun was here?" Nino asked, now that he had finally been able to get Sho off the phone. He’d spent the last fifteen minutes making placating noises to Sho while gesturing desperately to Ohno for some help, but the older man hadn’t been able to come up with an answer to his distress signals, merely sitting and looking at him in with a fond gaze that made his heart flutter.

Ohno looked at him in confusion. "He is cutting fruit for me, just over there."

But Jun was nowhere in sight. Ohno was immediately on the alert, worried that Jun had left because of Nino's presence.

"He must have gone to the bathroom. You know what he's like."

Ohno walked to Jun's work area closely followed by a curious Nino.

"What's that on the cutting board?" Nino asked, taking in the abandoned knife and the red stains.

"It looks like blood." Ohno's heart began to race.

"There's more here," Nino said pointing to the trail of red drops that led to the bathroom.

"Jun!" Ohno yelled at the closed door.

"Is it locked?" Nino asked pushing past Ohno and trying the handle.

Fortunately it opened easily. Unfortunately Jun was lying unconscious on the floor in a pool of his own blood.

++++

"Where is he?" Sho was frantic as he rushed up to Aiba who was standing protectively in front of the door to Jun's hospital room.

"I don’t think you should see him," Aiba replied, refusing to move.

"He's my husband. You have no right to stop me."

"Do you want to upset him any more than he already is? He rang me at three this morning crying his eyes out. I wanted to come and retrieve him and bring him back to my place but he refused. If you really do care about him then you'll respect his wishes."

Sho sagged, "How is he? Is our baby okay?"

"The doctor is with him right now. I'm sure that she will come and fill us in when she's finished."

Aiba took Sho's arm and led him to the row of seats running down the corridor opposite the room.

"We argued. This is my fault. He was so upset last night and I was so wrapped up in my own anger...if our baby..." Sho couldn't continue as he felt a sharp pang in his chest.

Aiba was in no mood to offer Sho any comfort. "You're right. This is your fault. He was happy. He had his job and you were here with him away from the pressures of work and family. What went wrong?"

"I told him that we would have to return to Tokyo."

"Why? What was so important?"

"My father expects me to return and he wants Jun and our baby to have the best possible life." Even to Sho's ears the words sounded weak.

"Isn't the best possible life one that’s filled with happiness?" Aiba responded with a glare.

At that moment the doctor emerged from Jun's room and looked around for Sho who immediately leapt to his feet, blinking nervously.

“Sakurai-san, you’ve been very lucky,” she said with a cold glare. “Matsumoto-san has concussion and he lost quite a lot of blood. He has twenty stiches in his hand and wrist but fortunately there has been no damage to the tendons.”

“Sensei, what about the baby?” Sho asked weakly.

“Your baby is fine at this moment, but your husband seems to be very stressed. Partners are supposed to be supportive at this time, not adding to the burden that the birth-parent is already carrying. This is your husband’s first baby and he has already experienced some problems earlier on in the pregnancy. I would urge you to do your best to keep him as calm and relaxed as possible or I won’t be able to guarantee a safe outcome for either of them.”

“May I see him?” Sho wasn’t particularly hopeful of a positive response after Aiba’s earlier words, but he couldn’t bear the thought of Jun lying there hurt and alone.

“Yes, but only as long as you promise to not upset him. When he regained consciousness earlier he was very agitated. Any repeat of that will not have good consequences,” the doctor replied sternly. “I anticipate him spending at least a week under our care, perhaps more depending on his test results.”

Sho suddenly felt very small indeed. Aiba’s glare backing up that of the doctor didn’t help much either.

++++

Jun was lying propped up in bed when Sho cautiously crept into the room.

Various leads stretched to important looking pieces of monitoring equipment and an IV was hanging on a stand next to the bed attached to a cannula inserted into Jun's arm. Jun's face was almost as pale as the linen on the bed. The room however was large and comfortable looking and decorated in soothing shades of blue.

Sho's stomach clenched at the sight of Jun's left hand and wrist swathed in bandages. It was his fault that Jun was overtired and had lost concentration. If not for their argument Jun would have still been safely in bed at home and in no position to be injured.

"Jun sweetheart?" Sho hesitantly stroked the back of Jun's unbandaged hand.

Jun's eyes fluttered open and he gazed at Sho with an unfocused gaze.

"Sho? Why are you here at Aiba's place?" Jun asked in confusion.

"You're in the hospital my love," Sho said as he gently stroked Jun's hair, carefully avoiding the bruising on Jun's temple. "You hit your head so things may be a little fuzzy."

"Hospital?" Jun's hand automatically went immediately to his belly. "My baby?"

"Don't fret, our baby is fine. You just need to rest."

"I cut myself. I didn't mean to, honestly," Jun said urgently, clutching at Sho's sleeve with his good hand.

“Just rest now Jun,” Sho said, bending to press a careful kiss on Jun’s forehead.

Jun’s eyes fluttered closed as he relaxed back down onto his nest of pillows.

Sho pulled a chair over to the side of the bed and took Jun’s hand entwining the long pale fingers with his own as he sat and watched over his husband as he slept, Aiba’s words of censure still ringing in his head.

After a few minutes he came to a decision. He stood and disentangled his fingers, taking great care to not disturb Jun as he left the room.

Aiba was still sitting patiently on the chairs outside the room waiting for the opportunity to confirm with his own eyes that his friend was safe. Sho walked up and spoke softly to him for a few minutes before shaking his hand and walking out of the hospital into the bright noonday light.

++++

Jun stirred and blinked at the late afternoon sun that was lighting the sky with a fiery orange glow. The blinds were mostly closed but the light was making its way into the room around the edges of the windowpanes.

He had a vague recollection of being at the bakery and Nino arriving but after that things were blurry. He moved his arm in attempt to push himself further up the bed and the stabbing pain running up his wrist soon reminded him of the knife slipping.

“You’re awake?” A pair of concerned brown eyes stared at him from close range.

“A-Aiba?” Jun had trouble getting the words out. His throat was dry, making it hard to swallow.

“Here, take a sip of juice.” Aiba held a glass filled with ice and a bendy straw up to Jun’s parched lips.

“I feel strange…like I’m not really here…and the light is so bright,” Jun said, holding up his good hand to shield his eyes.

Aiba immediately adjusted the blinds and switched off the bright light directly above Jun’s bed.

“Do you feel okay? Do you want me to call a nurse?” Aiba asked as he offered more of the juice to his friend.

“My head hurts,” Jun replied with a wince.

“You cracked it pretty good on the sink when you fainted,” Aiba said, brushing Jun’s hair back from the darkening bruise. “It’s a good thing that you have such a hard head.”

“Where’s Sho? Why isn’t he here? Even if he doesn’t care about me he should care about his baby.”

“See? This is exactly what I mean about you having a hard head,” Aiba said as he took hold of Jun’s hand and squeezed it reassuringly. He was concerned by the sudden rise in Jun’s blood pressure on the monitor. “Sho rushed here as soon as he found out about your accident and stayed until he knew that you would be okay. Don’t you remember?”

Jun vaguely remembered a strong hand holding his own hand comfortingly but he had recollection of speaking with Sho at all.

“You were fast asleep and he had something important that he absolutely had to do so he asked me to stand in for him for a while, but he promised to be back as soon as possible.”

“Did he tell you that he ordered me to go back to Tokyo?” Jun pouted.

“He told me that he thought it best that you both return there,” Aiba said calmly. “I don’t necessarily agree with him, but did you talk about this with him and at least give him a chance to explain his feelings?”

“I…I kind of locked myself in the bathroom, and then left really early this morning before he was awake,” Jun replied, fragmented memories of the previous night rushing back into his mind.

“So you didn’t actually discuss it?”

“I was just so angry that he didn’t consult me. I didn’t want him to go back to his old ways of just deciding what’s best for the both of us. I guess I wasn’t really fair on him.” Jun was picking at a loose thread on the quilt as he spoke, hoping to avoid Aiba’s eyes.

“Jun, you know I love you like a brother, but this time I think that I’m actually on Sho’s side.” Aiba didn’t want to upset Jun unnecessarily but he felt that he had to speak his mind. After speaking with Sho earlier he had a much better understanding of the pressure that he was under. “When things got too hard you ran away from Sho and came to live with me and when Sho said something that you didn’t like you locked yourself in the bathroom and refused to discuss things with him. Don’t you think that it’s time for you to start facing up to your problems instead?”

Jun glared at him. “So you’re on his side now as well? You want me to go away?”

“Not at all, I just think that perhaps you need to remember that soon you will have a baby to look after and that maybe it’s about time you started acting like a grown up.” Aiba tempered his words with soft strokes of Jun’s hair.

The whole conversation was making Jun’s head spin. He closed his eyes to steady himself as he remembered that Sho had been trying to work from here and Tokyo at the same time, making the eight hour round trip on a regular basis but always returning to him and their apartment at the end of the day, no matter how late the hour. Perhaps he was being unreasonable in asking Sho to give up his life and move here with him. Even though it would break his heart, perhaps he should agree to their return to their old life in Tokyo under the close supervision of Sho’s parents if it would make life less stressful for his husband.

++++

Jun was woken by someone entering his room. He figured that it was just the nurse coming to check on him and didn’t even bother to look up. Due to his concussion he had been roused from his sleep with annoying regularity since his admittance. But the rustle of plastic alerted him to the fact that it was someone else altogether sneaking into his room in the middle of the night.

He groggily switched on the bedside lamp revealing an exhausted looking Sho frozen on the spot as the placed a plastic bag bulging with takeaway food containers down on the wheeled tray table at the foot of his bed.

“Sho?” Jun asked huskily, squinting his eyes at the clock on the far wall of his room. “What time is it?”

“It’s a little after midnight,” Sho said tiredly as he collapsed into the chair beside Jun’s bed. “Nino texted me to tell me that when he was here earlier you didn’t eat any of your dinner because the sight and smell of it was making you feel sick. Obviously the hospital didn’t take into account your current ninety-five percent tomato based diet.”

Taking a closer look at the carry bag Jun tried to identify the logo of the restaurant the food was from. “This is from Osteria Martini,” Jun said slowly as he realized why the packaging looked so familiar to him.

“I wanted to make sure that you have a proper meal and I know it’s your favourite,” Sho said as he hauled himself out of the chair and pulled out a container of tomato basil soup. “If you don’t eat, then they won't let you come home.”

“But Osteria Martini is in Tokyo,” Jun said with a puzzled frown.

“But it’s your favourite,” Sho said simply. “I’ll just go the relatives’ room and warm it up for you.”

“You drove for eight hours to bring me food? I love you for it but have you lost your mind?”

“I was already there when I heard from Nino.” Sho put the soup back down and carefully sat on the edge of the bed, looking at Jun with a serious expression. “We argued and I made you unhappy. I’m sorry that I didn’t talk to you first and just assumed that you would be okay with us going back to Tokyo.”

“It’s my fault too. I shouldn’t have acted like a child and run away instead of staying and discussing things like an adult,” Jun said quietly. He was angry with himself for the tears that were pricking at the back of his eyes when he was trying to appear to be strong and mature. "I told you that I hate you. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it." Jun looked down at his wrist eyes widening as he remembered the night before. "My bracelet! I threw it...it's probably lost or broken..." he added in a broken voice.

"Shhh sweetheart, it's perfectly safe. Luckily I have quick hands or else I'd have a pearl sized dent in my head," Sho said as he pulled it out of his jacket and carefully slipped it onto Jun's good wrist.

"I can't believe I went so crazy without giving you a chance to explain," Jun was feeling quite ashamed of his irrational behaviour.

“I guess that our little cherry tomato in there has to take some of the blame for you being a bit overemotional,” Sho replied as rested his hand on Jun’s belly.

Jun laughed at the affectionate nickname that Sho had just made up for their baby. Since neither of them wanted to know the sex it was hard to not call their baby ‘he’ or ‘she’ when they spoke and ‘it’ was out of the question.

“When you look less exhausted and my head has stopped buzzing we need to discuss this calmly, without arguing this time.” Jun was worried by the dark circles under Sho’s eyes. “But first you need to get some sleep.”

“There’s nothing to discuss,” Sho replied, moving his hand up from Jun’s belly to gently cup his cheek.

“Sho…I…” Jun felt his headache worsen as his anger threatened to return.

“There’s nothing to discuss, because I drove to Tokyo today to speak with my parents and tell them that we will be staying here indefinitely.”

“You what?”

“My mother was upset at first, mostly because she wants to be close to her first grandchild. But my father was actually happy. He told me that he’d been waiting for me to finally exert my independence and that he wishes us well. They felt really bad about nagging us about getting pregnant straight away and felt awful when they found out that we had temporarily separated. All that pressure I’ve been feeling lately only existed in my own mind. I am the biggest idiot that ever existed.”

Jun was trying to understand what Sho was saying but his brain was unwilling to cooperate. “We can stay? Permanently?”

“For as long as you want, but we can talk about that tomorrow,” Sho said as he stood up and retrieved the soup once again, but not before pressing a lingering kiss to Jun’s slightly parted lips. He could see that Jun was looking extremely pale and tired and didn’t wish to keep him awake any longer than it took for him to eat his supper. “Right now you need food. I can hear your stomach growling from here.”

“What about you? Aren’t you hungry too?” Jun was eyeing the assorted boxes and guessed that they contained far more food than he could handle alone.

“Well, I did pick up some lasagne as well and some semolina orange syrup cake for dessert,” Sho said as a greedy glint lit up his tired eyes.

“Lasagne? With tomato sauce?”

“Um…yes…,” Sho replied with a worried look.

“Don’t worry, I’m not about to steal the food from your mouth,” Jun said. “As long as you bought enough food for three we should be fine.”

“I keep forgetting that you’re eating for two,” Sho said as he rummaged in the bag.

“I didn’t mean me. You’re the one who eats as much as two normal people.”

“Hey, are you implying that I’m fat?”

“Not fat exactly, a bit fluffier perhaps…” Jun replied as he looked Sho over, appreciating his extra-bouncy looking butt.

Their light-hearted bickering was interrupted a moment later as a very annoyed nurse bustled into the room and told Sho off for being there out of visiting hours and disturbing Jun when he should be resting.

Sho immediately looked at her with big round eyes as he pouted his lips. It took him less than three minutes to not only sweet talk her into letting him stay but she also volunteered to go and heat the food up for them and rustle up a juice for him and some milk for Jun at the same time.

“Is that how you act when you are negotiating a business deal?” Jun asked with a tinge of jealousy.

“No of course not; I was just doing my best for you and our little cherry tomato,” Sho said as he flopped back down in the chair next to Jun’s bed.

“You were right, you are an idiot sometimes,” Jun said fondly as he gazed at the bracelet that was back where it belonged. “And that’s exactly why I love you so much.”

There was no response from the chair apart from a soft snore.

Date: May 2nd, 2017 11:40 am (UTC)
cielmelodies: (Default)
From: [personal profile] cielmelodies
.
..
....
My heart. The feels. Too much. *Hides under bush with box of tissues*
Oh poor Jun and poor Sho *whimpers*
MY POOR BABIES. And the lil cherry tomato.
Can we finally get a happy chapter next one?
//Please? *Pouts*
(Love this so much <3)

Date: May 2nd, 2017 03:10 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] gemplee
Just imagining the cut on jun's hand...shivers.

I am glad that aiba was firm with Jun and helped him to see sense. That is what good friends do.

Thanks for the update.

Date: May 2nd, 2017 06:48 pm (UTC)
lilly0: (Default)
From: [personal profile] lilly0
I'm so proud of Jun and Sho! First Jun managed to realize what he did wrong, and realized it's not always only Sho's fault (Of course there was Aiba there to help him realize, but still...) and then Sho goes and is being amazing and show his love for Jun. He is wonderful. I love how he stood up against his parents and they even approved and how he came back with food he knew Jun would like <3
Love this!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now Jun needs to eat well and get better soon <3 Poor boy <3

Thanks so much for this update!!

Date: May 14th, 2017 09:04 pm (UTC)
yuuki_73: Ninomiya Kazunari (Default)
From: [personal profile] yuuki_73
GOSH! Sho is so real on this fic with his stupidity, his strength, his dorkiness, his wholeheartedly love that I can't help wanting one for me!!!! Just like him....

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