learashi: (Sakumiya)
[personal profile] learashi
Pairing: Sakumiya

Rating: PG

Genre: fluff, friendship

Disclaimer: I don’t own Arashi, nor do I clean their apartments. (And obviously neither do Sakumiya.)

Summary: “Sho? Where are you?” Nino called as he trudged across the apartment. His back hurt and he needed an early night.
“In the bath and I have enough beer for two,” Sho replied, his voice echoing off the tiled walls.




Slamming the door behind him Nino toed off his shoes; untying laces seemed like too much hard work at his current level of exhaustion. He tossed his bag on the floor next to them and slid his feet into the embarrassing fluffy slippers with googly eyes on the front that had been a gift from Aiba.

Nino would never admit it to anyone, least of all Aiba himself, but they were incredibly comfortable and warm and the ridiculousness of them made him smile on the worst of days. As he shrugged off his coat he noticed Sho’s own sensible black slippers were missing, instead his shoes were thrown in a haphazard pile with the rest of his shoes, the laces undone and tangled together like a nest of tiny snakes.

For a fleeting moment Nino thought about perhaps tidying up some of the mess that was crawling across the edges of the genkan, but thought better of it. Jun would probably be visiting on the weekend and would immediately go into a cleaning frenzy while muttering dire warnings about them breeding germs and diseases in their less than pristine living conditions.

Sho always argued that they spent so little time at home that it was impossible for any nasties to latch on to them anyway. With their relentless schedules they hardly even saw each other and there was no way that either of them was going to waste valuable make out time by mopping the floor or scrubbing the toilet.

“Sho? Where are you?” Nino called as he trudged across the apartment. His back hurt and he needed an early night.

“In the bath and I have enough beer for two,” Sho replied, his voice echoing off the tiled walls.

Nino had a sudden burst of speed as he headed towards the bathroom removing his clothes and tossing them on the floor as he went; perhaps he wasn’t as tired as he’d previously thought he was.

++++

Nino was trying to concentrate on his latest script but he kept getting distracted by the munching noises coming from beside him.

“What on earth are you eating?” he asked turning around and glaring in exasperation.

“A smmmffwwwcchh,” Sho mumbled, his cheeks bulging as he chewed and talked at the same time.

“Huh?”

Sho swallowed his mouthful with a gulp, “A sandwich. Want some?”

“Did you make it yourself?” Nino asked dubiously.

“Yep, there was enough leftover stuff in the fridge to make a tasty snack,” Sho replied happily as small crumbs fell from the corner of his mouth onto the sofa. “Want half?”

“Maybe, but what stuff did you find in the fridge?” Nino was trying to remember the last time that either he or Sho had gone grocery shopping.

“Um, some salad stuff and a chunk of that fancy cheese with the mould on the outside that Jun keeps bringing us when he comes over,” Sho replied, holding a quarter of the sandwich up and waggling it in Nino’s direction.

Nino’s stomach growled loudly reminding him that he had missed both lunch and breakfast. He shrugged and took the offered sandwich, taking a tentative bite. To his surprise it was actually quite tasty so he continued to nibble on it while reading his script.

++++

Nino groaned and reached for his phone with a shaking hand. Sho was lying beside him clutching the grimy bedsheets with an equally pained expression.

Even more painful than their present condition, the agony of ringing Jun and asking for help outweighed anything that their bout of food poisoning could throw at them.

++++

Jun was like an avenging angel, clutching a bottle of bleach in one hand and a tin of spray disinfectant in the other. “We all know that Sho is a glutton, but I expected better of you Nino.”

Nino and Sho clutched each other’s hands desperately as Jun whirled around their apartment, barking orders at Aiba and Ohno who meekly ran to obey his instructions.

Within a remarkably short period of time, everything was cleaner than it had been since they moved in. Unfortunately this meant that Jun had time to continue his interrogation.

"What did you two idiots eat exactly?"

"It was just a sandwich," Sho protested weakly from his curled up position on the bed. "I checked that everything was still before its expiry date."

"Nino ate something that Sho made?" Aiba asked gleefully before bursting into hyena-like laughter.

Ohno, who was leaning lazily against Aiba, chuckled as well, ignoring Nino's offended glare.

"It's not like he cooked anything and everything tasted okay at the time," Nino muttered.

"What exactly did you put on it?" Jun asked as he nudged the mugs of herbal tea he'd prepared earlier in his bedraggled bandmates' direction.

"Salad and cheese." Sho scrunched his face up at the bitter taste of the tea.

"Did you wash the salad properly?"

"Of course." Sho's cooking skills might be minimal but he did have common sense.

"And the cheese?" Jun asked, absently rubbing his earlobe.

"Look, Miyama, instead of firing questions at us why don't you go and check out the fridge and let us die in peace?" Even when feeling as if his insides were now on the outside, Nino's tongue was still sharp as usual.

Ohno and Aiba snickered, earning themselves one of Jun's patented death stares.

"Um...we'll go and check out the fridge while you make sure that they finish your special tea." Ohno grabbed Aiba and dragged him to safety in the kitchen.

++++

The interrogation was put on hold as first Nino and then Sho had to make emergency dashes to the recently cleaned bathroom.

Soon they were settled back in bed, appreciating the fresh lemony scent of the sheets and forcing down the last dregs of Jun’s medicinal teas as he bundled up the dirty sheets and shoved them into the washing machine with perhaps more force than was absolutely necessary.

Aiba walked into the room gingerly carrying a plate in front of him with a queasy expression. It contained a fuzzy whitish blackish triangle of cheese.

“I think we found the problem,” Aiba said distastefully, slapping Ohno’s hand away from it.

“It looks fine to me,” Ohno said, rubbing his hand with a pout. He’d only wanted a taste.

“What on earth is that supposed to be?” Jun backed away from the smell wafting from it.

“You should know, since you’re the one who’s always giving us fancy cheese,” Sho croaked.

“That is definitely not fancy cheese. It looks more like something that’s escaped from a laboratory.”

“But it’s fuzzy on the outside,” Nino protested, eager to back his boyfriend up. “Just like the cheese you usually give us.

Sho nodded his agreement, and then regretted it as the room spun slightly on its axis.

“Those cheeses have white fuzz, not black!” Jun said with a sigh. “No wonder the pair of you are sick. Didn’t it taste weird?”

“All of those cheeses taste weird,” Nino said with a shrug; eating had always been his lowest priority.

Sho thought about it before answering, trying to exactly recall what the sandwich tasted like.

“It did taste a little off, but I kind of got distracted looking at the curve of Kazu’s neck when he was bending over to read his script and the way his mouth moved when he chewed,” he finally answered, casting a loving look at Nino as he spoke.

“Bleurgh!” Aiba cringed and decided that it was time to leave. Ohno tagged along with him leaving Jun alone with the green-tinged pair.

“I hope you’ve learned the difference between fancy and dangerous after this disaster,” Jun huffed.

His words were tempered by him making sure that they had everything close to hand and were comfortably tucked into bed before he swept from the room, carrying the cheese as if it was radioactive.

A minute later they heard the rustle of a garbage bag and then the front door closed and they were finally alone.

Sho turned to Nino and tugged him closer, nuzzling the side of his neck. They might both be sick as dogs but at least they were getting to spend some time alone together at last.

Unfortunately not quite together, as Nino shoved Sho away from him and dashed back to the bathroom once again, slamming the door behind him. On the plus side, at least it was clean and shiny.

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